I feel. I believe that when two people are creating the relationship their potential would not only be added, but multiplied is also to small word to express this. Universe needs us together
I'm in tantric world. It means now and again I´m meeting, connecting with someone a little bit deeper. This may confront me with different energies, people, other expectations, readiness, openness. This difference may bring confusion to me and the other person as well.
I will start from the most idealistic dream and most perfect relationship, what I could wish. Then I would go to less beautiful till on the end to the one what I could still accept. We never could be sure, what may happen, so that's why, while without any one, I'm open for any relationship, any woman(?), because we know that the things may go from down to the top as other way around as well. Tantra give us the ¨tools¨ what make the choice of direction going easier. .
1st choice
Quote from one of my recent letter
In general at that moment I don´t wanna limit my potential only to one person. If there someone would come in my life, some princess, goddess Kali on white horse, with who I would wish to be together forever, probably it would be the person , who would do the same sharing love, tantra work with passion and without limits as I do.
She would be able to give the workshops together with me, watching with proud when I´m making the other girl happy. She would be able to accept that I massage, I cuttle, or even maybe kiss and maybe make love with another person because she would know that I´m doing it to help that person.
Of course she may do the same and we could even share freely our experiences to support each other. There would be full trust, that the love between us is beyond the healing relationships, what we are sharing to help people. Full transparency and honesty about everything. Love on the highest level
This is my dream who may hold me next to her and I know its just the question of time, that will happen because it happened already not once. I do not worry because I´m in love any way. In love in myself, in love in whole universe. Love is energy within and everywhere. Only conditioning made us not feeling it.
2nd choice
At the beginning I started to wondering what shall I write... then I decided I would go to the last choice first...
Last choice
Last thing what could be acceptable for me is the relationship with a person, who needs healing, breaking the conditioning and I may be with that person to help her. It has to be clear that this relationship is probably for just period of time and it can´t require any limitation, possessiveness on any side. At that level ( what through healing, liberation, connection may go deeper ) person have to accept and understand that we are together in very open relationship for her benefits and where there would be time, energy, readiness, this relationship may end.
In tantra, we have guidelines rather than rules. This means that, as higher we are on this ladder of choices, the negotiations are more possible. But please never hesitate to express your limits, questions, concerns and wishes.
Somehow there is big gap between the first and tha last choice. When I started with the second choice I just realised that we are living in the constantly changing ocean of opportunities and situations. This what it seems to be useful today may be relevant tomorrow...
So find yourself in this scale. Feel, think, meditate, where between or may be on the top ;) <3 you see us there.
ReplyDeleteMyrthe
10 Mar
Hi Michal,
I like to respond to your message about your wishes about relationship(s). I like it that you are communicating about it to create more clarity. What I don’t like, is that I feel that how you describe your last choice makes it seem like you wouldn’t think that this kind of partner would have much to offer you. You only talk about helping her, about healing she seems to need, not about any value she has anyway. I like it when there is no limitation, possessiveness on any side, though I feel it is important that anyone can feel free to express feelings of jealousy, insecurity and the feeling that you wish you could have the other person for yourself. Expression of these kinds of feelings shouldn’t be seen as a bad thing, but maybe as something you could work through by being open and accepting about it that these feelings just arise and need some attention. But in a relationship where someone is just regarded as someone who needs healing I don’t feel like she could work through her insecurities that well. How can she become confident enough about herself if she’s getting the message that she can only be someone’s last choice, less valuable than others?
I prefer relationship anarchy (http://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/andie-nordgren-the-short-instructional-manifesto-for-relationship-anarchy), relating to people without any hierarchy of love. I might sometimes feel more love for one person than for another, but that’s not my preference and I certainly wouldn’t want to keep it that way. I would not choose to love someone more than others, because that would also mean I choose to love others less. So that would be a limitation of my love and I do not want to limit love. And I would also not ask of anyone to love me the most (and thereby love others less). Of course there can be practical reasons to invest more in one relationship than in another. I can understand some polyamorous people tend to use terms like “primary” and “secondary” to describe different levels of commitment, though I would not prefer to use such language to discriminate between my relationships because it may seem that it has something to do with difference in levels of love which I don’t want. I like this article because it can maybe make this topic a bit clearer: http://www.lovemore.com/poly/hierarchy-in-polyamorous/
If I would call any love primary, for me it would be universal love. Any specific relationship would have to support this universal love. I would rather lessen my commitment to any specific relationship that isn’t supportive of my universal love, than lessen my commitment to universal love. I like that my contact with you supports universal love. I like assisting you with tantra, talking with you, being sometimes in physical intimate contact (like hugging or cuddling) and would also like to engage in different kinds of activism with you. I don’t know yet which role I want tantra to have in my life. Expressing love is a priority for me, and tantra is one way to do that, but not the only way. If I would learn how to teach tantra I feel open to teaching it with you for some time (it might be until goddess Kali on the white horse arrives to teach with you ;)).
Love,
Myrthe
26.5.2015 - Last reflection of me going out from relationship concept, having someone special and = obsession in to more and more unconditional Love
ReplyDeleteI choose for Love - this unconditional - and to achieve unconditional Love we have to ¨uncondition¨ our self not only from sex but also even from love( this conditioned ones ) . Somehow it gets to me feeling that make someone to special is connected to some obsession in us. Something feel in me more and stronger that no one should be more special or rather we all suppose to be special. This feels more like unconditional love. It´s still very new, fresh feeling in me, what still have to grow and get strong. Still I´m not sure about it but somehow it feels good to be in that direction.
I´m aware that not every one would agree on that but agreeing is not the point because we are in different perspective in path of life. Acceptance for each other and not harming - Ahimsa is very important in any togetherness, healing and sharing love.
From other side understanding and seeing things in bigger picture, being active even violently if needed to stop bigger violence. Let the love not fear lead us to better universe. Connecting on every level with whole as deeper as possible.